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that he has discovered your name?
It is Legion, and he publishes it to warn his countrymen.
THAT we should be indignant with
other people for doing well and being well paid for doing what we can not do at
all is not surprising, however humiliating it may be. But that we should add a
querulous complaint that such people do not always agree with us in opinion, and
even dare to say so, is simply silly. It is surely nobody's fault that he can
not deliver a lecture, for instance, with such success as to be often solicited
to speak; but to whine that other people can, and that they are actually paid
for it, and still further, that they say what they think, is the most amusing
snivel that the press affords.
There is great discomposure, upon
the part of those who do not believe the principles of the Declaration of
Independence, that most of the popular Lyceum lecturers in the country do. At an
utter loss how to attack them for such temerity, the most convenient thrust has
hitherto been that they were "itinerants." But to this enormity is now added
that they are "strollers," "radicals," "nomadic," "reformers," etc., etc.; and
if you go to hear them you may be outraged by hearing something with which you
do not agree.
When this sort of remark is made
by a newspaper it may be likened unto a gun which kicks the marksman over. For
what is a newspaper but a daily lecture from the point of view of the editor? If
a man goes to hear a lecture from
Mr. Beecher he knows exactly to what he
exposes himself, as when he buys a copy of the Tribune or of the Journal of
Commerce. To complain that he heard certain opinions from Mr. Beecher, or that
he found in the Journal of Commerce sentiments precisely the reverse of those of
the lecture, would be sure to elicit only the amused answer, "Why, of course;
what did you expect?" To hear an editor who writes a lecture which is sold in
many copies for several cents each, and read by the audience, abusing an orator
who writes a lecture, which he sells in the lump for a certain sum to an
audience which hears it read or spoken by the author, is a striking case of pot
and kettle. The orator no more insults any one of his audience because he says
what that one does not like, than a loyal editor insults a rebel because he
prints an editorial unsavory to the rebellious palate. In like manner when we
buy certain papers among ourselves we know what to expect, and we are zanies if
we whimper that they talk treason.
It seems not to be understood by
those who complain of lecturers as "radicals," that the people who buy tickets
to a course of Lyceum lectures are aware of the names and views of the speakers
and of the topics they are to treat. The tickets are bought with the full
knowledge that the tendency of most all of the speakers is toward the
conservatism of Washington, Jefferson, Hamilton, and Adams, and directly away
from that of Vallandigham and Jeff Davis. If any conservative of the
Vallandigham-Davis school goes to the lecture, why should he squirm? Would he
complain if he bought the Evening Post? Is there any deception? Is it not a fair
bargain? Does he pay twenty-five cents to hear Wendell Phillips chant the
praises of the patriarchal institution, or Bishop Clark eulogize Strauss, or Mr.
Milburn extol the Yankees? Or has he made up his mind that he is insulted
whenever he hears a forcible dissent from his own political, or religious, or
philosophical doctrine? If he has, he is a subject for Mr. Barnum, and should be
contemplated in a glass case.
Of course no reader is ignorant
that the point of the objection lies beneath all. this petulance. It is simply
the knowledge that the Lyceum is both an educator and an indicator; and that
when the speakers most sought from one end of the country to another utterly
loathe the anarchical spirit which now calls itself "Conservatism," it is a sign
that the people are so true at heart as to make political charlatans and
REPLY TO A WESTERN FRIEND.
A CORRESPONDENT in Wisconsin
writes to the Lounger: "You make a list of Conservatives, Dickinson, M'Carthy,
Randall, Everett, Holt, Johnson, Brownlow, and Hamilton, and set them against
Wood, Vallandigham, Rynders, Davis, Brooks, Toombs, Van Buren, Wigfall, Spratt,
Keitt, and Rhett. You make a case, and decide it. Perhaps many good men will
agree with you. But do you think the question stated with common honesty? Now
let me make a case, and ask you to decide it. I choose to name as the
representatives of the Conservative element of the country
Seymour, Bronson, O'Conor, Washington Hunt, Ira
Thurlow Weed, Robert C. Winthrop, Senators
Browning, Cowan, Collamer,
General McClellan, and that sort of folks; and,
as their opposites, Ben Wade, Senators Chandler, Sumner, and Hale, Lovejoy,
Beecher, Greeley, & Co.; and I sincerely but earnestly ask you to state frankly,
as between them, where you stand."
The question is as simple as the
answer shall be. That sort of folks would be doubtless surprised to find
themselves classed together. Judge Collamer and Judge Harris, for instance, have
no more sympathy with Mr. O'Conor's views of our general politics, and of this
rebellion, than they have with Yancey's. And inasmuch as Messrs. Wood,
Vallandigham, Rynders, Brooks, and Van Buren were the most ardent and
conspicuous of Governor Seymour's advocates in the late election, speaking with
him and for him, it is perfectly clear that their Conservatism can not radically
differ from his, unless they misunderstand each other; and as the Lounger has
already often enough repudiated the least sympathy with Messrs. Wood, Rynders,
and Van Buren, why should his correspondent be in any doubt as to his equal want
of sympathy with the men with whom they act, and of whom they are political
The Lounger still, and
"honestly," prefers the conservatism of Mr. Everett to that of Governor
Seymour—of Mr. Dickinson to that
of Fernandc Wood—of Andrew Johnson to that of John Van Buren. And as he believes
that the views of Messrs. Everett, Johnson, Brownlow, Holt, and Dickinson, in
regard to the scope of this war and the true policy of its conduct, do not
differ substantially, however they may differ in detail, from those of Wade,
Beecher, and the others, he is glad to call himself a Conservative of that
school and not of the other.
—And might he not put it to his
"good-natured" friend whether the case he makes is stated with any more
"honesty" than the Lounger's? Of course extreme men must always be named to
indicate tendencies. Senator Harris certainly does not agree in all points with
Senator Wade, for instance. But does the "good-natured" man at the West
"honestly" believe that, upon the whole, Judge Harris does not agree with
Senator Wade more than with Governor Seymour and his friends? The Conservative
in this country is the man who would preserve the spirit as well as the, form of
the Government. And it is because the party at this moment which especially
claims to be conservative seems to the Lounger to be entirely careless of that
spirit that he denies its right to the name.
HUMORS OF THE DAY.
A GENTLEMAN recently visited the
Campana Museum, for which the French Government gave $1,000,000. Every object he
saw made him cry, "Admirable! first-rate!" One of the keepers saw him, and was
so pleased to see at last somebody delighted with the museum, that he went up to
him and said, "You are familiar with archaeology, I see, Sir; doubtless an
antiquary from Heidelberg, or Vienna, or Jena?" "No, Sir; but my wife, what's
dead and gone, used to sell butter in just such pots as them there." The keeper
vanished, and now speaks to nobody, until after a regular introduction.
A Bangor paper says that a pig
lately walked into a tailor's shop there, and before he was noticed by the
proprietor made his way toward the cutting board—attracted, doubtless, by the
smell of cabbage in that locality.
A gentleman, one evening, was
seated near a lovely woman, when the company around him were proposing
conundrums to each other. Turning to his companion, the said, "Why is a lady
unlike a mirror?" She "gave it up." "Because," said the rude fellow, "a mirror
reflects without speaking, a lady speaks without reflecting." "And why are you
unlike a mirror?" asked the lady. He could not tell. "Because a mirror is smooth
and polished, and you are rough and unpolished." The gentleman owned there was
one lady who did not speak without both reflecting and casting reflections.
"The boy at the head of the class
will state what were the Dark Ages of the world." Boy hesitates. "Next. Master
Biggs, can you tell me what the Dark Ages were?" "I guess they were the ages
before spectacles were invented." "Go to your seats."
"So you wouldn't take me to be
twenty!" said a rich heiress to an Irish gentleman, while dancing the polka.
"What would you take me for, then?"
"For better or worse," replied
the son of the Emerald Isle.
"You've destroyed my peace of
mind, Betsy," said a desponding lover to a truant lass.
"It can't do you much harm, John,
for 'twas an amazing small piece you had, any way," was the quick reply.
"Sir, I will make you feel the
arrows of my resentment."
"Ah, Miss, why should I fear your
arrows when you never had a beau?"
There are two kinds of cats—one
with nine lives, the other with nine tails; the former always fall upon their
own feet, the latter upon other's backs.
At a wedding recently, when the
officiating priest put to the lady the question, "Wilt thou have this man to be
thy wedded husband?" she dropped the prettiest courtesy, and with a modesty
which lent her beauty an additional grace, replied, "If you please."
"I am an unlucky man, gentlemen,
exclaimed a poor fellow. "If I were to seize Time by the forelock I do believe
it would come right out, and leave him as bare as a barber's block."
"It is all very pretty talk,"
said a recently married old bachelor, who had just finished reading an essay on
the "Culture of Women," just as a heavy milliner's bill was presented to
him—"'tis all very pretty this cultivation of women; but such a charge as this
for bonnets is rather a heavy top-dressing—in my judgment."
There are ties which should never
be severed, as the ill-used wife said when she found her brute of a husband
hanging in the hay-loft.
A celebrated Parisian dandy was
ordered by his physicians to follow a course of sea-bathing at Dieppe. Arrived
at that delightful town, he ordered a machine and attendant, and went boldly
into the water. He plunged in bravely, but in an instant after came up puffing
and blowing. "Francis," said he, "the sea smells detestably; it will poison me.
Throw a little eau de Cologne into the water, or I shall be suffocated!"
"Say, Caesar Augustus, why am
your legs like an organ-grinder?" "Don't know, Mr. Sugarloaf; why is they?" "'Cos
they carry a monkey about the streets."
They tell the story of a young
lady of temperate habits who was advised by her physician to take ale to fatten
her up. She bought a quart bottle of the article, and drank a tea-spoonful twice
a day in a tumbler of water; but finding that she was fattening too rapidly,
reduced the dose one half, and thus kept within bounds.
A gentleman having engaged a
bricklayer to make some repairs in his cellar, ordered the ale to be removed
before the bricklayer commenced his work. "Oh, I am not afraid of a barrel of
ale, Sir," said the man. "I presume not," said the gentleman; "but I think a
barrel of ale would run at your approach."
"Josh, does the sun ever rise in
the West?" "Never." "Never?" "Never!" "You don't say so! Well, you won't get me
to emigrate to the West, if it's always night there. I've a cousin who is ever
boasting how pleasant it is in that region, but it must be all moonshine."
Mrs. Partington is of opinion
that Mount Vesuvius should take sarsaparilla to cure itself of eruptions. The
old lady thinks it has been vomiting so long nothing else would stay on its
It is but an ill-filled mind that
is filled with other people's thoughts.
ON Tuesday, December 23, in the
Senate, the annual report of the Secretary of the Interior was received, also
the report of Hon. Reverdy Johnson on
General Butler's administration of affairs
at New Orleans. Senator Lane, of Kansas, gave notice of a bill to authorize the
raising of a force of two hundred regiments of
negro soldiers. Senator Saulsbury's resolution in reference to the alleged sending of
into Delaware at the last election was discussed for some time, but no final
disposition was made of it. The Committee on the Conduct of the War presented
their report on the recent
battle at Fredericksburg. The Bankrupt bill was then
taken up, and its consideration occupied the remainder of the open session. An
executive session was held, after which the Senate, in accordance with the
resolution adopted by the House on Monday, adjourned to meet on the 5th of
January, 1863. —In the House, Mr. Pendleton, of Ohio, moved to have placed on
the Journal the entire protest of the thirty-six members against the President's
suspension of the writ of habeas corpus, but the House negatived the motion by
74 against 20. The Ways and Means Committee's bill providing for the executive
and judicial expenses for the year ending with June, 1864, was reported and made
order for the 5th of January,
1863. The Postal Committee also reported a bill, which was passed, authorizing
the Postmaster-General to establish a postal money order system. The bill
relative to the Sioux and Dacotah Indians was taken up in Committee on the
Whole; but when the time for taking a vote arrived there was not a quorum
present, and the subject was laid over. The negro question was then discussed
for some time, after which the House adjourned, to meet on the 5th of January,
REPORT ON THE BATTLE OF
The Joint Committee on the
Conduct of the War reported, on 23d, in answer to a Senate resolution of the
18th inst. calling on that committee to inquire into the facts relating to the
recent battle at Fredericksburg, Virginia, and particularly as to what officer
or officers are responsible for the assault, that they had proceeded to the
head-quarters of the Army of the Potomac and taken the depositions of
Hooker, and Brigadier-Generals
Woodbury and Haupt, and, on their return to Washington, those of Major-General
Halleck and Brigadier-General Meigs. All the facts relating to the movements of
the army under General Burnside, the forwarding of pontoons and supplies, the
recent battle at Fredericksburg, are so fully and clearly stated in the
depositions submitted that the committee report the testimony without comment.
The testimony shows that General Burnside made the attack on his own
responsibility, but that General Halleck is mainly answerable for the
non-arrival of the pontoons at Falmouth till it was too late to cross safely.
A LETTER FROM THE PRESIDENT.
"EXECUTIVE MANSION, WASHINGTON,
Dec. 22, 1862.
"To the Army of the Potomac;
"I have just read your Commanding
General's preliminary report of the battle of Fredericksburg. Although you were
not successful, the attempt was not an error, nor the failure other than an
accident. The courage with which you, in an open field, maintained the contest
against an intrenched foe, and the consummate skill and success with which you
crossed and recrossed the river in the face of the enemy, show that you possess
all the qualities of a great army which will yet give victory to the cause of
the country and of popular government. Condoling with the mourners for the dead
and sympathizing with the severely wounded, I congratulate you that the number
of both is comparatively so small. I tender to you, officers and soldiers, the
thanks of the nation.
ANOTHER REBEL RAID.
On Saturday, 27th ult., the
rebels made a dashing attack with cavalry and artillery in front of Dumfries.
The place was held by the Fifth, Seventh, and Sixty-sixth Ohio Volunteers, with
a section of a battery. Being worsted at this point, after a brief contest, the
rebels pushed on to Occoquan, where they met Colonel Candy's command, and had
another brush with them. Considerable loss occurred on both sides, and the enemy
again made for Anandale, by way of
Bull Run and Wolf Run, and thence toward
Vienna, which place they passed through at midnight. Meantime General Geary
hastened to iutercept them, and cause up with them between Dumfries and Bull
Run, chasing them southward. They seized the telegraph office at Burke's Station
and burned the bridge at Acotink. The enemy do not appear to have gained any
thing by this bold raid except a few sutler's wagons and some ambulances which
they picked up on the way. They captured one gun at Dumfries, but were compelled
to abandon it. They were reported to be 4000 strong, but this is probably an
The news from the Shenandoah
Valley represents that the rebels have evacuated
Winchester and have gone toward
Staunton, destroying the railroad as they went. The destitution at Winchester is
reported as fearful. General Jones, with 2500 rebels, had occupied it for some
time past; but the Union troops, under Colonel Keyes, advanced from Romney on
Christmas morning and took possession of the town.
A CALIFORNIA STEAMER CAUGHT BY
On the 7th December the
Alabama came across the Ariel, bound from New York to Aspinwall, off the coast
of Cuba, and brought her to by sending a 68-pound shot through her foremast.
Captain Semmes then took off her captain, and held him a prisoner for three
days, expressing his determination at the same time to land the passengers
either at some point on the island of Cuba or St. Domingo, and then to destroy
the vessel. At the earnest remonstrance of Captain Jones, in behalf of the women
and children on board, however, he consented to let her proceed. The Alabama
started in pursuit of the Champion, then on her return voyage to New York, but
failed to find her. Captain Jones carried the Ariel safe into Aspinwall, and
arrived at this port on 28th, but brought no gold. With the fear of the Alabama
before his eyes, he wisely left the treasure at Aspinwall.
ANOTHER PRIVATEER AFLOAT.
By advices from Havana, it
appears that the steamer Florida, otherwise and better known as the Oreto, has
succeeded in escaping from Mobile, with a new of one hundred men, having run the
gauntlet of the blockade in the darkness of the night.
A ROAR FROM JEFF DAVIS.
Jefferson Davis has issued a
violent retaliatory proclamation to the emancipation proclamation of Mr.
Lincoln, denouncing the course of General Butler in New Orleans in vehement
terms, and dooming him and all the officers in his command to death by the
halter, when they are caught. Jeff knew, when he issued his proclamation, that
Butler had been removed.
A NEW WAY TO COLLECT OLD DEBTS.
The firm of John N. Cocke & Co.,
in Portsmouth, Virginia, having refused to pay their debts to Northern citizens,
on the ground that a law of the Confederate States has released and discharged
them from all obligations to Northern creditors, General Viele has issued a
proclamation, informing said firm that their excuse for refusal to pay is a
treasonable shun, and that if they do not pay up a sufficient amount of their
property will be seized and sold to discharge the debt.
DESTRUCTION OF THE "CAIRO."
The Union gun-boat Cairo has been
destroyed in the Yazoo River by the explosion of a rebel torpedo. A large rent
was made in her bottom, and she began to fill rapidly. The crew, however, got
all safe ashore before she went down, although with some difficulty. Other
torpedoes, in the shape of ordinary demijohns filled with combustibles, were
discovered by our fleet, and taken up without doing any mischief.
THE ATLANTIC TELEGRAPH AGAIN.
THE Atlantic Telegraph Company
has held a very encouraging meeting in London, at which the plan for raising
£600,000 sterling for the purpose of laying a new cable was submitted to the
assemblage. £75,000 sterling had been subscribed. The new capital stock will be
issued in shares of the value of £5 sterling each.
A PORTUGUESE KING.
The British Government has agreed
with the other protecting Powers to respect the protocol by which Prince Alfred
is prevented from accepting the throne of Greece; this appears to have given
satisfaction to the French Government and the Cabinet of Russia. The three
Powers have agreed to recommend to the Greeks as their ruler Ferdinand, king
consort of Portugal, father of the present king of that country. Ferdinand acted
as Regent of Portugal during the minority of his son. He is a duke of the royal
house of Saxony, forty-six years of age, and very popular.
A FLATTERING ACCEPTANCE.
LITTLE BOTTLES.—"Ah! Miss Laura,
you will favaw me with your delightful company in a sleigh-ride—ah! I suppose—of
MISS LAURA.—"Bottles, certainly!
Right off—now—as soon as you please. Take a sleigh-ride with you or any other